An-Nisa · Madani · ayah 73 of 176

An-Nisa 4:73

وَلَئِنْ أَصَـٰبَكُمْ فَضْلٌ مِّنَ ٱللَّهِ لَيَقُولَنَّ كَأَن لَّمْ تَكُنۢ بَيْنَكُمْ وَبَيْنَهُۥ مَوَدَّةٌ يَـٰلَيْتَنِى كُنتُ مَعَهُمْ فَأَفُوزَ فَوْزًا عَظِيمًا

“But if bounty comes to you from Allāh, he will surely say, as if [i.e., showing that] there had never been between you and him any affection, "Oh, I wish I had been with them so I could have attained a great attainment."[197]”

Saheeh International

Essence

When good comes to the believers, the one who hung back wishes he had been there: not for love of them, but for his share.

A reflection

Glad at your loss, sad at your gain

In the middle of the man's sentence, Allah interrupts. Ka-an lam takun baynakum wa-baynahu mawadda: as if there had never been any affection between you and him.

One classical commentator explains why that aside sits exactly there. The ayah before showed the man pleased at the believers' setback. This one shows him pained at their success. A person only treats a hostile stranger like that, the commentator says. Whoever loves someone is happy when they are happy and sad when they are sad. When the two are reversed, that is enmity showing itself. So Allah breaks into the speech with something like astonishment. Look at him. You would think there had never been any bond between you at all.

Another commentator adds that the aside guards against a misreading. Hearing 'I wish I had been with them', you might think he longed to stand by them. The end of the sentence shows what he really longed for.

That gives every friendship a simple test. Watch how a person reacts to your news, good and bad.

Picture a man who notices something about a friend of twenty years. When he lost his job, the friend phoned within the hour. He was oddly bright, full of stories of others who had been laid off. When the man found a better job months later, there was a single thumbs-up, three days late. Nothing was said. Everything was said.

The test also turns inward. When a friend, a sibling, a colleague has good news, what moves in you first? Joy, or a quiet sense of loss? When they stumble, is there anything in you that feels relieved?

No one controls the first flicker. But you can notice it, refuse it, and pray for the person until your heart catches up.

The full entry has 5 more reflections, questions to sit with, and "Live it today" - with the words, the roots and the tafsir alongside. Free, no account, works offline.