Al-Muzzammil · Makki · ayah 10 of 20

Al-Muzzammil 73:10

وَٱصْبِرْ عَلَىٰ مَا يَقُولُونَ وَٱهْجُرْهُمْ هَجْرًا جَمِيلًا

“And be patient over what they say and avoid them with gracious avoidance.”

Saheeh International

Essence

Bear what they say, and leave them the way you would leave a room: without slamming the door, and without staying to argue.

A reflection

A leaving with no grudge attached

Wa-hjurhum hajran jamīlā. And leave them with a beautiful leaving.

The pairing is odd until you sit with it. Hajr is the ordinary word for cutting someone off, the opposite of staying connected. Jamil, beautiful, usually describes a face, a garden, good manners. Putting them together asks for a separation that is somehow still graceful.

One classical lexicon spells out what that combination allows. Hajr can happen with the body, staying away; with the tongue, no longer arguing or answering back; or with the heart, no longer carrying the grudge inside. The same source says a person facing real, ongoing mockery is invited to choose whichever of the three he can manage, while still aiming for grace in whichever one he picks.

That is a wider menu than it first looks. You do not have to achieve all three to obey the ayah. Perhaps you cannot yet stop the tongue from wanting to answer back, but you can at least leave the room. Perhaps the room cannot be left, a shared workplace, a family gathering, but you can at least stop replying to every jab. The heart, forgiving the grudge itself, may take longest of all, and that is allowed to come last.

What is not allowed is pretending the leaving never happened, carrying on as if nothing was said, while privately nursing the insult for years. Hajran jamilan asks for an honest exit, taken cleanly, in whichever of the three ways you can actually manage today.

The full entry has 5 more reflections, questions to sit with, and "Live it today" - with the words, the roots and the tafsir alongside. Free, no account, works offline.