An-Nisa · Madani · ayah 35 of 176

An-Nisa 4:35

وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ شِقَاقَ بَيْنِهِمَا فَٱبْعَثُوا۟ حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهِۦ وَحَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهَآ إِن يُرِيدَآ إِصْلَـٰحًا يُوَفِّقِ ٱللَّهُ بَيْنَهُمَآ ۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرًا

“And if you fear dissension between the two, send an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from her people. If they both desire reconciliation, Allāh will cause it between them. Indeed, Allāh is ever Knowing and Aware.”

Saheeh International

Essence

When a marriage splits into two sides, send one fair person from each family, aim for repair, and remember that Allah knows every hidden intention.

A reflection

Two names at the end, for all four people

Every quarrelling couple carries two versions of the same row. Hers, told to her sister on the phone in a supermarket car park. His, told to a colleague over a sandwich at work. Both versions are true. Both are edited.

The ayah ends with two names: ʿAlīm, Knowing, and Khabīr, Aware. One concise commentary glosses the second as knowing what is inside exactly as He knows what is outside. Another reads the closing line as a warning to both spouses and both arbiters against straying from the truth.

That turns the whole process round. A human arbiter hears two edited versions and has to guess where the cuts were made. Allah needs neither version. He already knows the sentence each spouse left out. He knows whether the arbiter from the husband's side secretly wants his cousin to win.

This is where the ego has to shrink. In a marriage dispute, pride wants one thing above all: to be found right. It polishes its version, recruits allies, keeps score. The ayah quietly lays every version beside the full record, held by the One who saw the whole marriage from its first day.

Then it offers a strange comfort. Some hurts cannot be proved to anyone. The coldness that leaves no evidence. The effort nobody noticed. The same two names that humble the one who edits are a refuge for the one who cannot get believed.

Does Allah need to remind us that He knows? He needs nothing. He is the Rich, and it is people who are poor towards Him (35:15). The reminder is for the four people in the room, at the moment each is tempted to win rather than to mend.

The full entry has 6 more reflections, questions to sit with, and "Live it today" - with the words, the roots and the tafsir alongside. Free, no account, works offline.